The Outback in a Heatwave

The new number one on my list of really, really, tremendously bad things to do is visiting the outback in a heatwave. Just say no, kids, just say no. After doing very little in Moree, we left for Charleville. I can no longer remember which day we did this because without the TV to educate me, the days all turn into one. It was very, very hot. I believe the air conditioner was lying to me because there is no way it was on during that drive. I'll have to get it to sign a stat dec. The morning tea break at St George turned into a most of the morning stop thanks mostly to the old bloke who accosted us at the Unique Egg. Not a sentence I ever saw myself writing, really. The Unique Egg is actually about 150 eggs. Emu eggs. Hand carved emu eggs. That are lit by an ever evolving array of lights (they're on LED now, but I have it on good authority that many other bulbs have been tried in the past). I'll pause the cynicism for for a moment to tell you that the eggs were actually pretty cool. Very pretty and all that. Putting the cynical cap back on now to tell you that the rest of it was hilarious in that way that only strange small town tourist attractions can be. The eggs are carved by Stavros, eccentric, hunting store owner and tireless self promoter. Incidentally, I know of a great place you can get a fluoro safety vest to stop your pig dog from getting mauled. He did one for Quentin Bryce, he did one for World Expo '88 (together we'll show the world), he did one for Barack Obama. It's all very impressive for a guy who charges 3 bucks admission for a dark room at the back of what is loosely called a sporting goods store. We spent the next hour or so listening to Stavros' old mate telling us stories about every town in the outback. I'm not sure I can take much more of this country hospitality. St George was followed by Roma and by followed I mean we ate sandwiches then got the hell out of there. Roma has 'The Big Rig'. It's an oil rig that looks like, well, an oil rig. Nothing to see here. More exciting was the memorial stone in the park beside it. A memorial to a class reunion. Yup. Then we got to Charleville but I'm too lazy to tell you about that now so, laters!